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The most valuable lesson I learned this year that took me so long to acknowledge is that you can never love a person into loving you back. Love isn't something you can impose on a person, just because you love them and are willing to do whatever it takes to make it work. It comes progressively, and sometimes you don't even realise that you're in love until one day something happens and you're like "damn I'm in love". That moment of realisation is usually the first step that will lead you either down the happy lane or the sad lane, depending on your luck.

Do you want to know what a breaking down feels like? Imagine over time you've been gradually knitting yourself into a person, carefully threading your souls together, making sure you share a genuine and profound bond, then one day the piece of fabric that you've been working so hard on snaps in the middle so suddenly. All the time and hard effort that you've invested, gone. Just like that.

I guess the thing I hate most about breaking with a person - besides obviously losing the person who's become such an integral part of your daily life - is what comes afterwards. I call it the What Could Have Been. Inevitably, you see them moving on with their life, finding someone new to love and in the back of your mind there's this fear that this budding love could be the one for them since everything they learnt from being with you, could be applied to this new relationship and they end up having a better love life than you. And perhaps you feel they kind of owed it to you for this kind of relationship - the what could have been - given that both of you didn't make the mistakes you both did and eventually tried to make things work.

Then you're going to find someone new and eventually start to open up to them and start knitting yourselves again. Funny how it seems like it's the same cycle but it never really is the same. That's because you learn and grow from your past relationships to make this one worth the heartbreak you felt before. You're more careful in taking your steps now, and you begin to see things in a much more mature perspective. But that's still a long way to go for me.

Man, unrequited love really leaves this detrimental psychological damage on you. It gets you constantly contemplating your self-worth, makes you constantly doubt whether you're good enough, and leaves you oblivious and numb to future love prospects because you're scared to open up anymore. You start building walls around your heart to safeguard and spare you from more heartbreak in the future.

But it's alright. I still have faith that someone will come along and love me like I'm brand new. It's just a matter of time.

For you, if you're reading this , it's will be a pure lie if i said i had already forgive you and i don't hold a grudge on you , but i can't never be grateful enough for all the lessons you came with. it still hurts , the pains will always stay there , i know times will heal but it still will leaves scars but after all ,i truly wish you happy with your life , till our path crossed again . you're a lesson ft. a bless 👌